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Wanna be a Bionic Woman? Get a Bionic Wrench by Carolyn Donovan

"I am woman, hear me roar..." in the home repair department, that is.
Stop your meowing and start roaring with the Bionic Wrench.

If I..were the king...of the forresssssssssssssssssssst!

Men seem to have forgotten that they learned to fix a flat tire, they learned to assemble furniture, they learned to go down to the cellar with a flashlight during a blackout and twist/flip every fuse in the box and yell up “Is that it?” Fewer women were taught these things. And thus, when a woman attempts to fix/build/assemble anything in the presence of a man, there is an immediate establishment of the master and nincompoop roles, and the master is an annoyed/frustrated one, which, I’m assuming, comes from the unequal distribution of directional knowledge and food preparation skills.

Men make us feel stupid when we try to fix something, which is why we normally resort to “Honey, the sink is clogged. Can you fix it?” When it comes to fixing stuff that needs fixing, we might want to do it, we just don’t think we can do it. (Of course, there’s the train of though that says many women never bother to learn anything do-it-yourself-y because they figure they will be married some day and the guy will do-it-himself-y, but that’s for another day...)

That's a dooferdangle and that's a whatchacallit...aren't they?

And then there are the tools. We don’t have any familiarity with them: we don’t know what they’re called, we don’t know what each one is for, and the idea that you’ve got both metric and imperial sizes of those little thingamajiggies and you need separate tools for each one is just, well, dumb. We also aren’t sure we’re strong enough to wield the tool, and that we might look like a dope trying to use them: does “Right-Tighty, Lefty-Loosey” still hold in the world of tools?

Holy smokes, someone built a better mousetrap! Except it's a wrench...

However, there is a tool out there that pretty much removes above-mentioned obstacles to a woman tackling her home-based projects, and I knew that as soon as I saw it: the Bionic Wrench by Loggerhead tools. It slips over nuts (not the tree kind) and bolts (not the fabric kind) without stripping either one or causing you to scrape your knuckles (because it doesn’t slip off whatever it’s tightening).

Also possibly useful for removing that wedding ring that is no longer needed

You need very little arm power (I believe something called torque is in play here) because it totally surrounds the item and therefore works on a much greater surface. The best part about the Bionic Wrench is it works on lots of things regardless of size or unit or measure. Bike wheels, computer tables, Christmas presents, every thing that needs tightening or loosening can probably have the Bionic Wrench used on it. Only nuts and bolts in very small spaces, where there’s not enough distance to get the Bionic Wrench over it, do not fall into this category, but I’m thinking that is probably less than 25% of whatever needs fixing.

The Loggerhead folks actually redesigned the Bionic Wrench "to be more universally ergonomic and comfortable" after receiving feedback from some women users. ROAR!!!

There are loads of women who are surprised that they are not partnered with a man at this point in their lives, and so wander about their houses/condos/apartments in dread that the wobble in the dining room table might prove “significant.” They cower in fear at the thought of putting together their flat-pak furniture from IKEA. Well, get over yourself, girlfriend, get a Bionic Wrench, and get fixing your own damn stuff!


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Photography by Wan Chi Lau